The Rose with thorns...

A kid planted a rose plant and watered it daily and before it blossomed, he examined it.

He saw the bud that would soon blossom, but noticed thorns upon the stem and he thought, "How can any beautiful flower come from a plant burdened with so many sharp thorns?

Saddened by this thought, he neglected to water the rose, and just before it was ready to bloom... it died.

So it is with many people. Within every soul there is a rose. The God-like qualities planted in us at birth, grow amid the thorns of our faults. Many of us look at ourselves and see only the thorns, the defects.

We despair, thinking that nothing good can possibly come from us. We neglect to water the good within us, and eventually it dies. We never realize our potential.

Some people do not see the rose within themselves; someone else must show it to them. One of the greatest gifts a person can possess is to be able to reach past the thorns of another, and find the rose within them.

Help others to realize they can overcome their faults. If we show them the "rose" within themselves, they will conquer their thorns. Only then will they blossom many times over.

A Dog's Purpose from a 6-year-old

Being a veteranarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolfhound named Belker.The dog's owners, Ron, his wife Lisa, and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle.

I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn't do anything for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home.
As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience.

The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker's family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for the last time, that I wondered if he understood what was going on. Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away.

The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker's Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives. Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, 'I know why.'
Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I'd never heard a more comforting explanation.

He said, 'People are born so that they can learn how to live a good Life -- like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?' The six-year-old continued, 'Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long.'

Live simply.
Love generously.
Care deeply.
Speak kindly.

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One apple in my bag

A teacher teaching Maths to seven-year-old Raju asked him, “If I give you one apple and one apple and one apple, how many apples will you have?”Within a few seconds Raju replied confidently, “Four!”

The dismayed teacher was expecting an effortless correct answer (three). She was disappointed. “Maybe the child did not listen properly,” she thought.

She repeated, “Raju, listen carefully. If I give you one apple and one apple and one apple, how many apples will you have?” Raju had seen the disappointment on his teacher’s face.

He calculated again on his fingers. But within him he was also searching for the answer that will make the teacher happy. His search for the answer was not for the correct one, but the one that will make his teacher happy. This time hesitatingly he replied, “Four…”

The disappointment stayed on the teacher’s face. She remembered that Raju liked strawberries. She thought maybe he doesn’t like apples and that is making him loose focus. This time with an exaggerated excitement and twinkling in her eyes she asked, “If I give you one strawberry and one strawberry and one strawberry, then how many you will have?” Seeing the teacher happy, young Raju calculated on his fingers again. There was no pressure on him, but a little on the teacher. She wanted her new approach to succeed. With a hesitating smile young Raju enquired, “Three?” The teacher now had a victorious smile.

Her approach had succeeded. She wanted to congratulate herself. But one last thing remained. Once again she asked him, “Now if I give you one apple and one apple and one more apple how many will you have?” Promptly Raju answered, “Four!”

The teacher was aghast. “How Raju, how?” she demanded in a little stern and irritated voice. In a voice that was low and hesitating young Raju replied, “Because I already have one apple in my bag.”

When someone gives you an answer that is different from what you expect don’t think they are wrong. There maybe an angle that you have not understood at all. You will have to listen and understand, but never listen with a predetermined notion.

The Perfect Boss

There were about 70 scientists working on a very hectic project. All of them were really frustrated due to the pressure of work and the demands of their boss but everyone was loyal to him and did not think of quitting their job.

One day, one scientist came to his boss and told him, "Sir, I have promised my children that I will take them to the exhibition going on in our township so I want to leave the office at 5:30 pm."
His boss replied, "OK, You're permitted to leave the office early today."

The Scientist started working. He continued his work after lunch. As usual, he got involved to such an extent that he looked at his watch only when he felt he was close to completion. The time was 8.30 PM.

Suddenly he remembered the promise he had made to his children.
He looked for his boss but he was not there. Having told him in the morning himself, he closed everything and left for home. Deep within himself, he was feeling guilty for having disappointed his children. He reached home. The children were not there.

His wife alone was sitting in the hall and reading magazines. The situation was explosive; any talk would boomerang on him. His wife asked him, "Would you like to have coffee or shall I straight away serve dinner if you are hungry?"

The man replied, "If you would like to have coffee, I too will have but what about the children?"
Hi wife replied, "You don't know? Your boss came here at 5.15 PM and has taken the children to the exhibition."

What had really happened was ... The boss who granted him permission was observing him working seriously at 5.00 PM. He thought to himself, this person will not leave the work, but if he has promised his children they should enjoy the visit to exhibition. So he took the lead in taking them to exhibition.

The boss does not have to do it every time. But once it is done, loyalty is established.
That is why all the scientists at Thumba continued to work under their boss even though the stress was tremendous.

By the way, can you hazard a guess as to who the boss was?

He was none other than the mastermind behind India 's successful nuclear weapons and missiles program-Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam, Former President of India.

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Neither Black nor White...

In life, you will never forget a lesson completely that you learned in your past.
When I was in elementary school, I got into a major argument with a boy in my class. I have forgotten what the argument was about, but I have never forgotten the lesson learned that day.

I was convinced that "I" was right and "he" was wrong - and he was just as convinced that "I" was wrong and "he" was right. The teacher decided to teach us a very important lesson. She brought us up to the front of the class and placed him on one side of her desk and me on the other.

In the middle of her desk was a large, round object. I could clearly see that it was black. She asked the boy what color the object was. "White," he answered.

I couldn’t believe he said the object was white, when it was obviously black! Another argument started between my classmate and me, this time about the color of the object.

The teacher told me to go stand where the boy was standing and told him to come stand where I had been. We changed places, and now she asked me what the color of the object was. I had to answer, "White." It was an object with two differently colored sides, and from his viewpoint it was white. Only from my side was it black.

My teacher taught me a very important lesson that day: You must stand in the other person’s shoes and look at the situation through their eyes in order to truly understand their perspective.

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Parents..

Conversation... this was narrated by an IAF pilot to IIT students on
Special seminar for HUMAN RELATION.

My parents left for our native place on Thursday and we went to the airport to see them off. In fact, my father had never travelled by air before, so I just took this opportunity to make him experience the same. In spite of being asked to book tickets by train, I got them tickets on Jet Airways.

The moment I handed over the tickets to him, he was surprised to see that I had booked them by air. The excitement was very apparent on his face, waiting for the time of travel. Just like a school boy, he was preparing himself on that day and we all went to the airport, right from using the trolley for his luggage, the baggage check-in and asking for window seat and waiting restlessly for the security check-in to happen.

He was thoroughly enjoying himself and I, too, was overcome with joy watching him experience all these things. As they were about to go in for the security check-in, he walked up to me with tears in his eyes and thanked me. He became very emotional and it was not as if I had done something great but the fact that this meant a great deal to him. When he said thanks, I told him there was no need to thank me.

But later, thinking about the entire incident, I looked back at my life. As a child how many dreams our parents have made come true. Irrespective of their affordability, they have catered to all our needs. Did we ever think about the sacrifices they had to make to accommodate many of our wishes? Same way, today when it comes to our children, we will ensure that we will have to give the child the best education,toys, etc.

But we tend to forget that our parents have sacrificed a lot for our sake to see us happy, so it is our responsibility to ensure that their dreams are realized and what they failed to see when they were young, it is our responsibility to ensure that they experience all those and their life is complete. Let us realize that old age is a second childhood and just as we take care of our children, the same attention and same care need to be given to our parents and elders.

Just because they are old does not mean that they will have to give up everything and keep sacrificing for their grandchildren also. They have wishes, too. Take care of your parents; it’s your turn.

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Laughter..

Norman Cousins , a famous journalist in the USA, who, in his 60's,was diagnosed as "terminally ill." He was given six months to live. His chance for recovery was one in 500.

He could see the worry, depression and anger in his life contributed to, and perhaps helped cause, his disease. He wondered, "If illness can be caused by negativity, can wellness be created by positivity?" He decided to make an experiment of himself.

Laughing was one of the most positive activities he knew. He rented all the funny movies he could find - Keaton, Chaplin, Fields, the Marx Brothers. (This was before VCRs, so he had to rent the actual films.) He read funny stories. He asked his friends to call him whenever they said, heard or did something funny.

His pain was so great he could not sleep. Laughing for 10 solid minutes, he found, relieved the pain for several hours so he could sleep. He fully recovered from his illness and lived another 20 happy, healthy and productive years. (His journey is detailed in his book, Anatomy of an Illness.) He credits visualization, the love of his family and friends, and laughing for his recovery.

Some people think laughing is a waste of time. It is a luxury, they say, a frivolity, something to indulge in only every so often. Nothing could be further from the truth. Laughing is essential to our equilibrium, to our well-being, to our aliveness. If we're not well, laughing helps us get well; if we are well, laughing helps us stay that way.

Give yourself permission to laugh - long and loud and out loud - whenever anything strikes you as funny. The people around you may think you're strange, but sooner or later they'll join in even if they don't know what you're laughing about.

Some diseases may be contagious, but none is as contagious as the cure. . . laughter.

The Survival of the Fittest

An apple tree gives around five hundred apples, each with ten seeds. We might think, "Why would you need so many seeds to grow just a few more trees?"

Nature has something to teach us here. It tells us: "Most seeds never grow. So if you really want to make something happen, you should better try more than once."

Darwin's theory of the Survival of the Fittest explains this-The individuals who best adapt to the environment are the ones who will most likely survive. They possess variations that give them a selective advantage.

This very well applies to our lives too. Simple instances in life:

1. Need to attend as many interviews to get one good job.
2. Need to interview forty people to find one good employee.
3. Converse with many people to buy or sell a product.
4. And you might meet a hundred acquaintances to find one special friend.

Laws of nature are not things to take personally. We just need to understand them - and work with them.

Successful people fail more often. They plant more seeds.

Google Search tips...

Google is the go-to search engine for most people in the world. But instead of just typing in a phrase and wading through page after page of results, there are a number of ways to make your searches more efficient.Here is a small list.

• Either/or. Google normally searches for pages that contain all the words you type in the search box, but if you want pages that have one term or another (or both), use the OR operator -- or use the "" symbol (pipe symbol) to save you a keystroke. [dumb little man]
• Quotes. If you want to search for an exact phrase, use quotes. ["dumb little man"] will only find that exact phrase. [dumb "little man"] will find pages that contain the word dumb and the exact phrase "little man".
• Not. If you don't want a term or phrase, use the "-" symbol. [-dumb little man] will return pages that contain "little" and "man" but that don't contain "dumb".
• Similar terms. Use the "~" symbol to return similar terms. [~dumb little man -dumb] will get you pages that contain "funny little man" and "stupid little man" but not "dumb little man".
• Wildcard. The "*" symbol is a wildcard. This is useful if you're trying to find the lyrics to a song, but can't remember the exact lyrics. [can't * me love lyrics] will return the Beatles song you're looking for. It's also useful for finding stuff only in certain domains, such aseducational information: ["dumb little man" research *.edu].
• Advanced search. If you can't remember any of these operators, use Google's advanced search
• Definitions. Use the "define:" operator to get a quick definition. [define:dumb] will give you a whole host of definitions from different sources, with links.
• Calculator. One of the handiest uses of Google, type in a quick calculation in the search box and get an answer. It's faster than calling up your computer's calculator in most cases. Use the +, -, *, / symbols and parentheses to do a simple equation.
• Numrange. This little-known feature searches for a range of numbers. For example, ["best books 2002..2007] will return lists of best books for each of the years from 2002 to 2007 (note the two periods between the two numbers).
• Site-specific. Use the "site:" operator to search only within a certain website. [site:dumblittleman.com leo] will search for the term "leo" only within this blog.

For more please check out
http://www.dumblittleman.com/2007/06/20-tips-for-more-efficient-google.html

Sorrows in Sand & Blessings in Stone

Two friends were walking through the desert. During some point of the journey, they had an argument and one friend slapped the other one in the face.

The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything, wrote in the sand:
'Today my best friend slapped me in the face.'

They kept on walking until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a bath. The one who had been slapped got stuck in the mire and started drowning, but the friend saved him.

After he recovered from the near drowning, he wrote on a stone:
'Today my best friend saved my life.'

The friend who had slapped and saved his best friend asked him, 'After I hurt you, you wrote in the sand and now, you write on a stone, why?'

The friend replied, 'When someone hurts us we should write it down in sand, where winds of forgiveness can erase it away. But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it.'

we should learn to write our hurts in the sand and to carve our benefits in stone.
They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.

Do not value the things you have in your life, but value who you have in your life!

This is Life...

In the picture, just look at their condition.. No place to sleep, still they have made some space for the cat and dog...

Water is pouring from the roof but still each one of them have a peaceful smile on their face.. Simply amazing!!!!!

The happiest people in the world are not those who have no problems, but those who learn to live with things that are less than perfect.

We are sharing what was shared with us! Keep Smiling Always.
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ARE YOU A CARROT, AN EGG, OR A COFFEE BEAN?

ARE YOU A CARROT, AN EGG, OR A COFFEE BEAN?

by Mary Sullivan

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as if as soon as one problem was solved a new one arose. Her mother took her to the kitchen.

The mother filled three pots with water.

In the first, she placed carrots.In the second she placed eggs.And the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil without saying a word. About twenty minutes later, she turned off the burners.

She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl.

Turning to her daughter, she said, "Tell me what you see."

"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied.

She brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did, and noted that they felt soft.
She then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg inside.

Finally, she asked her to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma.
The daughter then asked, "So, what's the point, mother?"

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity - boiling water - but each reacted differently.

The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak.

The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid center. But, after sitting through the boiling water, its insides had become hardened.

The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water...they had changed the water.

"Which are you?" she asked her daughter. "When adversity knocks on yourdoor, how do you respond?

Are you a carrot , an egg, or a coffee bean?"

Think of this: Which am I?

Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity, do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat?

Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financialhardship, or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my outer shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and a hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water - the very circumstances that bring the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor of the bean. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you instead of letting it change you.

When the hours are the darkest and trials are their greatest do you elevate to another level?

How do you handle Adversity?

ARE YOU A CARROT, AN EGG, OR A COFFEE BEAN?

The Law of the Garbage Truck

Read an article similar to my earlier post. It goes as:

One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport . We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his breaks, skidded,and missed the other car by just inches!

The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was really friendly.

So I asked, 'Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!'
This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck'

He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment.As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you.

Don't take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don't take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home or on the streets.

The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day. Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets.

'Love the people who treat you right..Pray for the ones who don't.'

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17 Essential Qualities of a Team Player

According to John C. Maxwell team Players are:

• Adaptable: If you won’t change for the team, the team may change you
• Collaborative: Working together precedes winning together
• Committed: There are no halfhearted champions
• Communicative: A team is many voices with a single heart
• Competent: If you can’t, your team won’t
• Dependable: Teams go to go-to players
• Disciplined: Where there is a will, there is a win
• Enlarging: Adding value to teammates is invaluable
• Enthusiastic: Your heart is the source of energy for the team
• Intentional: Make every action count
• Mission Conscious: The Big Picture is coming in loud and clear
• Prepared: Preparation- the difference between winning and not winning
• Relational: If you get along, others will go along
• Self improving: To improve the team, improve yourself
• Selfless: There is no "I" in team
• Solution-Oriented: Make a resolution to find the solution
• Tenacious: NEVER, NEVER, NEVER QUIT!!!!

One is too small a number to achieve greatness!

Think before you act...

At the airport after a tiring business trip a lady's return flight was delayed. She went to the airport shop, bought a book, a coffee and a small packet containing five gingernut biscuits. The airport was crowded and she found a seat in the lounge, next to a stranger.

After a few minutes' reading she became absorbed in her book. She took a biscuit from the packet and began to drink her coffee. To her great surprise, the stranger in the next seat calmly took one of the biscuits and ate it.

Stunned, she couldn't bring herself to say anything, nor even to look at the stranger. Nervously she continued reading. After a few minutes she slowly picked up and ate the third biscuit. Incredibly, the stranger took the fourth gingernut and ate it, then to the woman's amazement, he picked up the packet and offered her the last biscuit.

This being too much to tolerate, the lady angrily picked up her belongings, gave the stranger an indignant scowl and marched off to the boarding gate, where her flight was now ready.
Flustered and enraged, she reached inside her bag for her boarding ticket, and found her unopened packet of gingernuts...

The Dog’s curly tail

This is a famous story, an extract from the Complete works of Swami Vivekanada

There was a poor man who wanted some money; and somehow he had heard that if he could get hold of a ghost, he might command him to bring money or anything else he liked; so he was very anxious to get hold of a ghost. He went about searching for a man who would give him a ghost, and at last he found a sage with great powers, and besought his help. The sage asked him what he would do with a ghost. I want a ghost to work for me; teach me how to get hold of one, sir; I desire it very much," replied the man.

But the sage said, "Don't disturb yourself, go home." The next day the man went again to the sage and began to weep and pray, "Give me a ghost; I must have a ghost, sir, to help me."
At last the sage was disgusted, and said, "Take this charm, repeat this magic word, and a ghost will come, and whatever you say to him he will do. But beware; they are terrible beings, and must be kept continually busy. If you fail to give him work, he will take your life."

The man replied, "That is easy; I can give him work for all his life." Then he went to a forest, and after long repetition of the magic word, a huge ghost appeared before him, and said, "I am a ghost. I have been conquered by your magic; but you must keep me constantly employed. The moment you fail to give me work I will kill you."

The man said, "Build me a palace," and the ghost said, "It is done; the palace is built." "Bring me money," said the man. "Here is your money," said the ghost. "Cut this forest down, and build a city in its place." "That is done," said the ghost, "anything more?" Now the man began to be frightened and thought he could give him nothing more to do; he did everything in a trice.

The ghost said, "Give me something to do or I will eat you up." The poor man could find no further occupation for him, and was frightened. So he ran and ran and at last reached the sage, and said, "Oh, sir, protect my life!" The sage asked him what the matter was, and the man replied, "I have nothing to give the ghost to do.

Everything I tell him to do he does in a moment, and he threatens to eat me up if I do not give him work." Just then the ghost arrived, saying, "I'll eat you up," and he would have swallowed the man.
The man began to shake, and begged the sage to save his life. The sage said, "I will find you a way out. Look at that dog with a curly tail. Draw your sword quickly and cut the tail off and give it to the ghost to straighten out." The man cut off the dog's tail and gave it to the ghost, saying, "Straighten that out for me." The ghost took it and slowly and carefully straightened it out, but as soon as he let it go, it instantly curled up again.

Once more he laboriously straightened it out, only to find it again curled up as soon as he attempted to let go of it. Again he patiently straightened it out, but as soon as he let it go, it curled up again.

So he went on for days and days, until he was exhausted and said, "I was never in such trouble before in my life. I am an old veteran ghost, but never before was I in such trouble." "I will make a compromise with you ;" he said to the man, "you let me off and I will let you keep all I have given you and will promise not to harm you." The man was much pleased, and accepted the offer gladly.
This world is like a dog's curly tail, and people have been striving to straighten it out for hundreds of years; but when they let it go, it has curled up again. How could it be otherwise?

WE HELP OURSELVES, NOT THE WORLD

The Trench digger

Read this story recently, thought would share it.

An elderly couple retired to the countryside - to a small isolated cottage overlooking some rugged and rocky heathland.

One early morning the woman saw from her window a young man dressed in working clothes walking on the heath, about a hundred yards away. He was carrying a spade and a small case, and he disappeared from view behind a copse of trees.

The woman thought no more about it but around the same time the next day she saw the man again, carrying his spade and a small case, and again he disappeared behind the copse.
The woman mentioned this to her husband, who said he was probably a farmer or gamekeeper setting traps, or performing some other country practice that would be perfectly normal, and so not to worry.

However after several more sightings of the young man with the spade over the next two weeks the woman persuaded her husband to take a stroll - early, before the man tended to arrive - to the copse of trees to investigate what he was doing.

There they found a surprisingly long and deep trench, rough and uneven at one end, becoming much neater and tidier towards the other end.

"How strange," the old lady said, "Why dig a trench here - and in such difficult rocky ground?" and her husband agreed.

Just then the young man appeared - earlier than his usual time.

"You're early," said the old woman, making light of their obvious curiosity, "We wondered what you were doing - and we also wondered what was in the case."

"I'm digging a trench," said the man, who continued, realising a bigger explanation was appropriate, "I'm actually learning how to dig a good trench, because the job I'm being interviewed for later today says that experience is essential - so I'm getting the experience. And the case - it's got my lunch in it."

He got the job.

Why we disagree

I would like to share the extracts from Swami Vivekananda's inspiring speech on "Why we disagree" at the World's Parliament of Religions, Chicago. It goes as follows :

I will tell you a little story. You have heard the eloquent speaker who has just finished say, "Let us cease from abusing each other", and he was very sorry that there should be always so much variance.

But I think I should tell you a story which would illustrate the cause of this variance.

A frog lived in a well. It had lived there for a long time. It was born there and brought up there, and yet was a little, small frog. Of course the evolutionists were not there then to tell us whether the frog lost its eyes or not, but, for our story's sake, we must take it for granted that it had its eyes, and that it every day cleansed the water of all the worms and bacilli that lived in it eith an energy that would do credit to our modern bacteriologists.

In this way it went on and became a little sleek and fat. Well, one day another frog that lived in the sea came and fell into the well. "Where are you from?" "I am from the sea." "The sea! How big is that? Is it as big as my well?" and he took a leap from one side of the well to the other. "My friend", said the frog of the sea, "how do you compare the sea with your little well?" Then the frog took another leap and asked, "Is your sea so big?" "What nonsense you speak, to compare the sea with your well" "Well, then," said the frog of the well, "nothing can be bigger than my well; there can be nothing bigger than this; this fellow is a liar, so turn him out."

That has been the difficulty all the while.

A few lines from a hymn which I remember to have repeated from my earliest boyhood, which is every day repeated by millions of human beings: "As the different streams having their sources in different places all mingle their water in the sea, sources in different tendencies, various though they appear, crooked or straight, all lead to Thee."

To read the entire speech click here.

Delegating work... 5 must-avoids ...

I would like to share an article I read long back in rediff.



Distributing work is never easy. Taking on a new job generally finds few takers, especially if the task is demanding and the time available is short.

Not surprisingly, we often run into problems while allocating work. Ranging from a simple goof-up by a colleague to ultimately having to do things yourself in order to get it done correctly and on time, we have all experienced the perils of delegation.

However, delegation need not always be such a thankless task. In principle, delegation actually makes great sense. Working in a team where you can delegate clearly and people understand their roles well can help any task get done efficiently and effectively.

Though people do try to delegate smartly, it often becomes difficult to do so. As usual, this can be analysed down to a simple list of easily avoidable mistakes. These include:


1. Not defining a clear 'follow-up and finish' schedule:


Delegating a task is only the beginning; you need to keep track of it until it is executed.
"To do this well, we need to ask ourselves three simple questions," says Pune-based corporate trainer Asha Chander, who conducts regular sessions on time management.
When and how frequently should I do a status check?What is the end date for the task?What are the parameters against which I will assess the work to see if it has been satisfactorily done?

2. Dictating, not delegating:

Those used to running the show by themselves often end up micromanaging when they delegate to others. The best way to assess the degree of handholding required is by matching the person with the task. As a general rule the lesser the experience, the more explicit the delegation. It also makes sense to monitor things closely if the situation is changing rapidly.

3. Delegating to the wrong person:

More importance is given to who the task is being delegated too rather than what is being delegated.
"That means if you follow the wrong path, your tasks might become low priority, even though they may have a high business impact. Conversely, if you go through the right people, or have the right person forwarding your request, things get done in a jiffy," says Sankule.

"You also need to be careful to delegate to someone who is your equal or junior to you in the hierarchy. If you send it to someone higher, even unknowingly, chances are they will consider it an affront. "

4. Delegating what you can eliminate:

As a thumb rule, you should follow the 'eliminate, automate, delegate sequence' for routine tasks.
Even if the task is mundane and boring, it's good to give credit to your team members and encourage them for even small improvements.

5. Playing passing the parcel (sub-delegating and cross-delegating unnecessarily)

The party game Passing The Parcel gives an interesting insight into the practice of delegation.Sometimes, a hot issue in a company is treated in a similar manner. It just gets passed around, until the senior management steps in. In the meanwhile, the matter is needlessly degated from A to B and onwards because nobody wants to be holding this particular 'parcel' when the 'music stops'.

Honestly, in some situations, such a situation is unavoidable. But if you really care about adding value, it helps to stop the unnecessary rounds. Speaking up will result temporary unpopularity but, in the long run, if you are at the right place, it will be much appreciated.

As you move higher and the scope of work you handle grows, delegating will become even more importance. Understanding these don'ts will go a long way in helping you master this skill.

Summing up, Mascerenhas adds, "The corporate hierarchy is like a game of Snakes And Ladders. Except here, instead of rolling the dice, it's the phone number that you dial (to delegate) that makes the difference and decides how you will grow."

To read the article click here

Tale about Buddha

This short story illustrates that every one of us has the choice whether or not to take personal offence from another person's behaviour.

It is said that on an occasion when the Buddha was teaching a group of people, he found himself on the receiving end of a fierce outburst of abuse from a bystander, who was for some reason very angry.

The Buddha listened patiently while the stranger vented his rage, and then the Buddha said to the group and to the stranger, "If someone gives a gift to another person, who then chooses to decline it, tell me, who would then own the gift? The giver or the person who refuses to accept the gift?"

"The giver," said the group after a little thought. "Any fool can see that," added the angry stranger.

"Then it follows, does it not," said the Buddha, "Whenever a person tries to abuse us, or to unload their anger on us, we can each choose to decline or to accept the abuse; whether to make it ours or not.

By our personal response, we can choose who owns and keeps the bad feelings."

Presumptions and prejudices....

I read this story on Presumptions and prejudices thought I would share it....

A party of suppliers was being given a tour of a mental hospital.One of the visitors had made some very insulting remarks about the patients.

After the tour the visitors were introduced to various members of staff in the canteen.The rude visitor chatted to one of the security staff, Bill, a kindly and wise ex-policeman.

"Are they all raving loonies in here then?" said the rude man.

"Only the ones who fail the test," said Bill.

"What's the test?" said the man.

"Well, we show them a bath full of water, a bucket, a jug and an egg-cup, and we ask them what's the quickest way to empty the bath," said Bill.

"Oh I see, simple - the normal ones know it's the bucket, right?"

"No actually," said Bill, "The normal ones say pull out the plug. Should I check when there's a bed free for you?"

The story illustrates lateral thinking, narrow-mindedness, the risks of making assumptions, and judging people and situations.

Make a difference.....

Here comes my post after a long break.........

There's a story I would like to share with you. It was inspired by the writing of Loren Eiseley. Eiseley was a very special person because he combined the best of two cultures. He was a scientist and a poet. And from those two perspectives he wrote insightfully and beautifully about the world and our role in it.

Once upon a time, there was a wise man, much like Eiseley himself, who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work. One day he was walking along the shore. As he looked down the beach, he saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself to think of someone who would dance to the day. So he began to walk faster to catch up. As he got closer, he saw that it was a young man and the young man wasn't dancing, but instead he was reaching down to the shore, picking up something and very gently throwing it into the ocean.

As he got closer, he called out, "Good morning! What are you doing?" The young man paused, looked up and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean."

"I guess I should have asked, Why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?"

"The sun is up and the tide is going out. And if I don't throw them in they'll die."

"But young man, don't you realize that there are miles and miles of beach and starfish all along it. You can't possibly make a difference!"

The young man listened politely. Then bent down, picked up another starfish and threw it into the sea, past the breaking waves. "It made a difference for that one!"

His response surprised the man. He was upset. He didn't know how to reply. So instead, he turned away and walked back to the cottage to begin his writings.

All day long as he wrote, the image of the young man haunted him. He tried to ignore it, but the vision persisted. Finally, late in the afternoon he realized that he the scientist, he the poet, had missed out on the essential nature of the young man's actions. Because he realized that what the young man was doing was choosing not to be an observer in the universe and make a difference. He was embarrassed.

That night he went to bed troubled. When the morning came he awoke knowing that he had to do something. So he got up, put on his clothes, went to the beach and found the young man. And with him he spent the rest of the morning throwing starfish into the ocean. You see, what that young man's actions represent is something that is special in each and everyone of us.

We have all been gifted with the ability to make a difference. And if we can, like that young man, become aware of that gift, we gain through the strength of our vision the power to shape the future. And that is our challenge,We must each find our starfish. And if we throw our stars wisely and well, it will propel our journey to excellence........

People always remember how you made them feel....

Twenty years ago, I drove a cab for a living. It was a cowboy’s life, a life for someone who wanted no boss. What I didn’t realize was that it was also a ministry.

Because I drove the night shift, my cab became a moving confessional. Passengers climbed in, sat behind me in total anonymity, and told me about their lives. I encountered people whose lives amazed me, ennobled me, made me laugh and weep.

But none touched me more than a woman I picked up late one August night.

I was responding to a call from a small brick fourplex in a quiet part of town. I assumed I was being sent to pick up some partiers, or someone who had just had a fight with a lover, or a worker heading to an early shift at some factory for the industrial part of town.

When I arrived at 2:30 a.m., the building was dark except for a single light in a ground floor window. Under these circumstances, many drivers would just honk once or twice, wait a minute, then drive away. But I had seen too many impoverished people who depended on taxis as their only means of transportation. Unless a situation smelled of danger, I always went to the door. This passenger might be someone who needs my assistance, I reasoned to myself. So I walked to the door and knocked.

“Just a minute,” answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor. After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 80s stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940’s movie.
By her side was a small nylon suitcase.

The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets. There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.

“Would you carry my bag out to the car?” she said.

I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman. She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb. She kept thanking me for my kindness.

“It’s nothing,” I told her. “I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother treated.”

“Oh, you’re such a good boy,” she said.

When we got in the cab, she gave me an address, then asked, “Could you drive through downtown?”
“It’s not the shortest way,” I answered quickly.

“Oh, I don’t mind,” she said. “I’m in no hurry. I’m on my way to a hospice.”

I looked in the rear view mirror. Her eyes were glistening. “I don’t have any family left,” she continued. “The doctor says I don’t have very long.”

I quietly reached over and shut off the meter. “What route would you like me to take?” I asked.

For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator. We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds. She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl. Sometimes she’d ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.

As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, “I’m tired. Let’s go now.”

We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico. Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move. They must have been expecting her. I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair.

“How much do I owe you?” she asked, reaching into her purse.

“Nothing,” I said.

“You have to make a living,” she answered.

“There are other passengers,” I responded.

Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly.

“You gave an old woman a little moment of joy,” she said. “Thank you.”squeezed her hand, then walked into the dim morning light. Behind me, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life.

I didn’t pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly, lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient at the end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away?
On a quick review, I don’t think that I have done anything more important in my life. We’re conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us unaware–beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.

People may not remember exactly what you did, or what you said, …but they will always remember how you made them feel.

Shared on text mail.

A Leader Should Know How to Manage Failure

Former President of India APJ Abdul Kalam : 'A Leader Should Know How to Manage Failure'

India Knowledge Wharton: Could you give an example, from your own experience, of how leaders should manage failure?

Kalam: Let me tell you about my experience. In 1973 I became the project director of India's satellite launch vehicle program, commonly called the SLV-3. Our goal was to put India's "Rohini" satellite into orbit by 1980. I was given funds and human resources -- but was told clearly that by 1980 we had to launch the satellite into space. Thousands of people worked together in scientific and technical teams towards that goal.

By 1979 -- I think the month was August -- we thought we were ready. As the project director, I went to the control center for the launch. At four minutes before the satellite launch, the computer began to go through the checklist of items that needed to be checked. One minute later, the computer program put the launch on hold; the display showed that some control components were not in order.

My experts -- I had four or five of them with me -- told me not to worry; they had done their calculations and there was enough reserve fuel. So I bypassed the computer, switched to manual mode, and launched the rocket. In the first stage, everything worked fine. In the second stage, a problem developed. Instead of the satellite going into orbit, the whole rocket system plunged into the Bay of Bengal. It was a big failure.

That day, the chairman of the Indian Space Research Organization, Prof. Satish Dhawan, had called a press conference. The launch was at 7:00 am, and the press conference -- where journalists from around the world were present -- was at 7:45 am at ISRO's satellite launch range in Sriharikota [in Andhra Pradesh in southern India]. Prof. Dhawan, the leader of the organization, conducted the press conference himself. He took responsibility for the failure -- he said that the team had worked very hard, but that it needed more technological support. He assured the media that in another year, the team would definitely succeed. Now, I was the project director, and it was my failure, but instead, he took responsibility for the failure as chairman of the organization.

The next year, in July 1980, we tried again to launch the satellite -- and this time we succeeded. The whole nation was jubilant. Again, there was a press conference. Prof. Dhawan called me aside and told me, "You conduct the press conference today."

I learned a very important lesson that day. When failure occurred, the leader of the organization owned that failure. When success came, he gave it to his team. The best management lesson I have learned did not come to me from reading a book; it came from that experience.

article shared on text mails

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Burdens in life...

One morning I wasted nearly an hour watching a tiny ant carry a huge feather cross my back terrace. Several times it was confronted by obstacles in its path and after a momentary pause it would make the necessary detour.

At one point the ant had to negotiate a crack in the concrete about 10mm wide. After brief contemplation the ant laid the feather over the crack, walked across it and picked up the feather on the other side then continued on its way.

I was fascinated by the ingenuity of this ant, one of God’s smallest creatures. It served to reinforce the miracle of creation. Here was a minute insect, lacking in size yet equipped with a brain to reason, explore, discover and overcome. But this ant, like the two-legged co-residents of this planet, also share human failings.

After some time the ant finally reached its destination - a flower bed at the end of the terrace and a small hole that was the entrance to its underground home. And it was here that the ant finally met its match. How could that large feather possibly fit down small hole? Of course it couldn’t. so the ant, after all this trouble and execising great ingenuity, overcoming problems all along the way, just abandoned the feather and went home.

The ant had not thought the problem through before it began its epic journey and in the end the feather was nothing more than a burden. Isn’t life like that!

We worry about our family, we worry about money or the lack of it, we worry about work, about where we live, about all sorts of things. These are all burdens - the things we pick up along life’s path and lug them around the obstacles and over the crevasses that life will bring, only to find that at the destination they are useless and we can’t take them with us.....

from mail archives

Attitude is a decision

Jerry is the manager of a restaurant.He is always in a good mood.When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would always reply: 'If I were any better, I would be twins!'

Many of the waiters at his restaurant quit their jobs when he changed jobs, so they could follow him around from restaurant to restaurant.Why? Because Jerry was a natural motivator.

If an employee was having a bad day, Jerry was always there, telling him how to look on the positive side of the situation.

Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Jerry and asked him:
'I don't get it! No one can be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?'

Jerry replied,'Each morning I wake up and say to myself, I have two choices today. I can choose to be in a good mood or I can choose to be in a bad mood.I always choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be victim or I can choose to learn from it. I always choose to learn from it.'

*****
Several years later...
I heard that Jerry accidentally did something you are never supposed to do in the restaurant business. He left the back door of his restaurant open.

And then in the morning, he was robbed by three armed men. While Jerry trying to open the safe box, his hand, shaking from nervousness, slipped off the combination. The robbers panicked and shot him.
Luckily, Jerry was found quickly and rushed to the hospital.

After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Jerry was released from the hospital with fragments of the bullets still in his body. I saw Jerry about six months after the accident.

When I asked him how he was, he replied, 'If I were any better, I'd be twins. Want to see my scars?'
I declined to see his wounds, but did ask him what had gone through his mind as the robbery took place.

'The first thing that went through my mind was that I should have locked the back door,' Jerry replied. 'Then, after they shot me, as I lay on the floor, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or could choose to die. I chose to live.'

Jerry continued,'The paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine.
But when they wheeled me into the Emergency Room and I saw the expression on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared.In their eyes, I read 'He's a dead man'.

I knew I needed to take action.'What did you do?' I asked.

'Well, there was a big nurse shouting questions at me,' said Jerry.'She asked if I was allergic to anything.'

'Yes,' to bullets, I replied. Over their laughter, I told them:'I am choosing to live. Please operate on me as if I am alive, not dead.'

Jerry lived thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude.I learned from him that every day you have the choice to either enjoy your life or to hate it. The only thing that is truly yours that no one can control or take from you is your attitude,so if you can take care of that, everything else in life becomes much easier.

Every day we wake up with two options to spend the day: Happy and Joyful ;Worried and Fearful.Its upto us to make the right choice

- shared on text mail

Teacher...

"Teacher : The child's third parent." says Hyman Berston

I wish to share a good article written by a teacher.

Has teaching changed the way I think? Yes, most certainly. My students have shown me how to manage time. I marvel at how deftly they juggle sports, academics, dance, theatre and pottery, for instance. I have learnt how to accept failure as i see my students taking success and failure with equanimity. I admire the confidence of my students who can go up on stage and speak extempore. I see them contesting an election, lose it, and yet work with the winner for the common good.

I have observed students working in teams, giving suggestions, disagreeing politely, coming to a consensus even if it means giving up one's original idea. They go ahead, never claiming: "That was my idea". I see them sharing everything - their history notes and lab coats, their problems and joys, their ice creams and food, with such ease. It is wonderful the way they appreciate their classmates' talents. If you ask them "Who do you think should be given this task?" you can be sure they will pick the most suitable person. Their loyalty to friends disconcerts me at times. Will their selflessness last as they grow into adults?

Students are so good at solving problems creatively. The other day as I was walking out of the school gate, if saw something interesting. One girl, recently elected senior-most student leader, was motivating her fellow students with an amusing game - to amazing response. When I questioned her she told me it was an activity to energise them so that they could put in their best for the forthcoming Teacher's Day function. How innovative!

My students have often shown me how to keep cool during a crisis, with a "Don't worry Ma'am, it can be done!" I am often amazed at their openness, at their ability to think critically, accept reasoned answers. What has struck me most is their daring - to chart unknown territories, to be constantly redefining rules, unafraid to be original.

My students make me think constantly. Last week I told my class, "In these 10 years of teaching from this book, no one has asked me this question!" I have to be always ready for surprises. I know they are not testing me - though they do, sometimes. They ask such basic questions that it stumps me.

I have taken so many things for granted. Students remind me that my learning is not complete and never will be. Above all, my students have taught me to be young, to never grow old. I have to be up-to-date in everything, in order to keep up with them.

For the article click here

"To teach is to touch lives forever." - Anonymous

Wow!

Last spring I was walking in a park. A short distance ahead of me was a mom and her three-year-old daughter. The little girl was holding on to a string that was attached to a helium balloon. All of a sudden, a sharp gust of wind took the balloon from the little girl. I braced myself for some screaming and crying.

But, no! As the little girl turned to watch her balloon go skyward, she gleefully shouted out, Wow!

I didn’t realize it at that moment, but that little girl taught me something.

Later that day, I received a phone call from a person with news of an unexpected problem. I felt like responding with Oh no, what should we do But remembering that little girl, I found myself saying, Wow, that’s interesting! How can I help you

One thing’s for sure - life’s always going to keep us off balance with its unexpected problems. That’s a given. What’s not preordained is our response. We can choose to be frustrated or fascinated. No matter what the situation, a fascinated Wow! will always beat a frustrated Oh, no.

So the next time you experience one of life’s unexpected gusts, remember that little girl and make it a Wow! experience. The Wow! response always works.

Expectations Expels

A turtle family went on a picnic. The turtles, being naturally slow about things,took seven years to prepare for their outings. Finally the Turtle family left home looking for a suitable place. During the second year of their journey they found it. For about six months they cleaned up the area, unpacked the picnic basket, and completed the arrangements.

Then they discovered they had forgotten the salt. A picnic without salt would be a disaster, they all agreed. After a lengthy discussion, the youngest turtle was chosen to retrieve the salt from home. Although he was the fastest of the slow moving turtles, the little turtle whined, cried, and wobbled in his shell.

He agreed to go on one condition: that no one would eat until he returned. The family consented and the little turtle left. Three years passed and the little turtle had not returned. Five years, Six years... Then in the seventh year of his absence, the oldest turtle could no longer contain his hunger. He announced that he was going to eat and began to unwrap a sandwich.

At that point the little turtle suddenly popped out from behind a tree shouting, "SEE I knew you wouldn't wait. Now I am not going to go get the salt."

Some of us waste our time waiting for people to live up to our expectations. We are so concerned about what others are doing that we often don't do anything ourselves...

Prayer..

A voyaging ship was wrecked during a storm at sea and only two of the men on it were able to swim to a small, desert like island.The two survivors, not knowing what else to do, agree that they had no other recourse but to pray to God. However, to find out whose prayer was more powerful, they agreed to divide the territory between them and stay on opposite sides of the island.

The first thing the first man prayed for was food. The next morning, the first man saw a fruit-bearing tree on his side of the land, and he was able to eat its fruit. The other man's parcel of land remained barren. After a week, the first man was lonely and he decided to pray for a wife. The next day, another ship was wrecked, and the only survivor was a woman who swam to his side of the land. On the other side of the island, there was nothing. Soon the first man prayed for a house, clothes, more food. The next day, like magic, all of these were given to him.

However, the second man still had nothing. Finally, the first man prayed for a ship, so that his wife and he could leave the island.In the morning, he found a ship docked at his side of the island. The first man boarded the ship with his wife and decided to leave the second man on the island. He considered the other man unworthy to receive God's blessings,since none of his prayers had been answered.

As the ship was about to leave, the first man heard a voice from Heaven booming, "Why are you leaving your companion on the island?"

"My blessings are mine alone, since I was the one who prayed for them," the first man answered. "His prayers were all unanswered, and so he does not deserve anything."

"You are mistaken!" the voice rebuked him. "He had only one prayer, which I answered. If not for that, you would not have received any of my blessings."

"Tell me," the first man asked the voice, "what did he pray for that I should owe him anything?"

"He prayed that all your prayers be answered."

For all we know, our blessings are not the fruits of our prayers alone, but those of another praying for us. Always remember to pray for others who are in need.

The Monk who sold his Ferrari

I would like to share the review of the book I recently read.

Julian Mantle, a very successful lawyer was the epitome of success. He had achieved everything most of us could ever want: professional success, a grand mansion in a neighborhood inhabited by celebrities, a private jet, a summer home on a tropical island and his prized possession a shiny red Ferrari parked in the center of his driveway.

The last few years Julian had worked day and night without caring about his mental and physical health. That helped him become a very rich and successful lawyer but took a toll on his health and mental state.Julian’s spark of life begins to flicker.Suddenly he has to come terms with the unexpected effects of his unbalanced lifestyle.His obsession with work has caused a heart attack.After recovery,he quit his law firm and took off without saying where he was headed.

Three years passed without any news from Julian. One day he paid a visit to his friend and former colleague John, who was now a cynical older lawyer. But Julian, in the past three years, had been miraculously transformed into a healthy man with physical vitality and spiritual strength.

John, who is a friend as well as co-worker of Julian, narrates the story. He begins by describing Julian’s flamboyant lifestyle, his exaggerated courtroom theatrics that has lead to unexpected after effects on his health and mental conditions.

Later he tells us about Julian’s Indian odyssey, how he met the sages of Sivana who had a life changing effect on him. Julian Mantle shares his story of transformation, relates his experiences with YogiRaman the leader of the sages of Sivana and the person who taught Julian his secrets of a happy and fulfilling life. He narrates to John the fable that contained the seven virtues for a life abundant with inner peace, joy and a wealth of spiritual gifts.

The Secret of Julian Mantle's change is all that's described in "The Monk who sold his Ferrari", a tale, which provides an approach to living a simple life with greater balance, strength, courage and abundance of joy.

Golden Rules for Career Success

Top 12 Principles I like among the Golden Rules for Career Success by Richard Moran

• Business is made up of ambiguous victories and nebulous defeats. Claim them all as victories.
• Write down ideas; they get lost, like good pens.
• Treat everyone who works in the organization with respect and dignity, whether it be the cleaner or the managing director. Don’t ever be patronizing.
• Never appear stressed in front of a client, a customer or your boss. Take a deep breath and ask yourself: In the course of human events, how important is this?
• Career planning is an oxymoron. The most exciting opportunities tend to be unplanned.
• Know how to write business letters including thank-you notes as well as proposals.
• Avoid working at weekends. Work longer during the week if you have to.
• The most successful people in business are interesting. Sometimes you’ll be on a winning streak and everything will click; take maximum advantage. When the opposite is true, hold steady and wait it out.
• Never in your life say, It’s not my job.
• Be loyal to your career, your interests and yourself.
• Understand the skills and abilities that set you apart.Use them whenever you have an opportunity.
• People remember the end of the project. As they say in boxing, Always finish stronger than you start.

For the entire set of rules click here.