Dealing With Difficult People at Work

Rise Above the Fray: Options for Dealing With Difficult People at Work
From Susan M. Heathfield

Difficult people come in every variety and no workplace is without them. How difficult a person is for you to deal with depends on your self-esteem, your self-confidence and your professional courage. Dealing with difficult people is easier when the person is just generally obnoxious or when the behavior affects more than one person. Dealing with difficult people is much tougher when they are attacking you or undermining your professional contribution.

Difficult people come in every conceivable variety. Some talk constantly and never listen. Others must always have the last word. Some coworkers fail to keep commitments. Others criticize anything that they did not create. Difficult coworkers compete with you for power, privilege and the spotlight; some go way too far in courting the boss’s positive opinion – to your diminishment.Some coworkers attempt to undermine you and you constantly feel as if you need to watch your back.

Five Tips for Dealing With Difficult People

• Start out by examining yourself - Always start with self-examination to determine that the object of your attention really is a difficult person’s actions.
• Explore what you are experiencing with a trusted friend or colleague.
• Approach the person with whom you are having the problem for a private discussion - Be pleasant and agreeable as you talk with the other person. They may not be aware of the impact of their words or actions on you. They may be learning about their impact on you for the first time. Or, they may have to consider and confront a pattern in their own interaction with people.
• Follow up after the initial discussion. Has the behavior changed? Gotten better? Or worse?
• You can confront your difficult coworker’s behavior publicly- Deal with the person with gentle humor or slight sarcasm. Or, make an exaggerated physical gesture – no, not serious wounding.

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